To Whom It May Concern

Dear Flyer-Passer-Out-er guy at Eureka Pizza,

I understand that Eureka Pizza has the best pizza deal in town. I get that you use the best quality toppings that topping-makers have to offer. I will even accept that your pizza was voted #1 in 2003 by the readers of the Northwest Arkansas Gazette. (Which, by the way, means nothing to me in southeast Kansas, and three years is a loooooooooong time for your food to go to seed. But back to my point....)

However, there is no need at all, whatsoever, EVER EVER, to leave advertising material on my windshield every single day for the past four months. Seriously. It will not get me to buy your pizza more often. It will only serve to irritate the crap out of me when I have to remove the flyer and dispose of it myself. That is like "giving" a friend a bag of your old clothes -- it is just another way to let someone else take out your trash.

That is all. Have a nice day.

Love and kisses,

D